Space Monkey
Feb. 19th, 2011 12:40 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
the_scrappyWhen so few things things triggered the memory, it was easy for Ames to think that she'd gotten over that day. But then something-- a halter strap cinched too tight, perhaps, or a jacket buttoned one too high, or the heel of a foot holding all the flimsy veins and bones of her neck in thrall-- would make her breath catch and suddenly she was in fourth grade all over again, kneeling on the garbage-strewn ground in the vacant lot next to Mrs. Maroonie's liquor store and watching, in tears, as paramedics tried to pump life back into the scrawny body at their feet.
It wasn't the epilogue that had screwed her up though-- made her screw up now, when it mattered, when she couldn't afford to go all stiff and terrified at the mere suggestion of pressure on her throat. It was how they'd gotten there.
---
"What's the matter, Ames? Scared?"
"No." Ames replied, sticking out her bottom lip and scowling at Cassie with all the meanness she could muster.
Cassie beamed.
"Good. Then you can go first."
"Nuh-uh, it was your idea!"
"You're just a 'fraidy-cat!"
"I'm not! This game's just stupid!"
"Ames, just go." Greg hissed. He was holding up his pants with one hand; in the other was his belt, with the buckle end wrapped once around his palm.
"But--"
But Cassie was giving her that look Ames' mom said reminded her of a cat with a bird under its paw, and Greg was watching the hole in the fence like a cop-- or worse, Mrs. Maroonie-- was gonna burst through and chase them off any second.
"Fine." She muttered. She straightened her back, jutted out her chin, and marched the four steps to Greg.
Greg's head pigeon-bobbed as he checked the fence one more time. When he turned to Ames, he opened the hand holding his pants and reached for the free end of the belt.
"Ha! You've got panties on!" Cas crowed.
Greg's hand shot down to his pants again, tugging them up.
"They're not panties, they're briefs!" Greg shouted.
"Nuh uh, they're like man-panties. Spider Man panties. Spider Manties!"
"Shut up Cas!"
Ames giggled, and Greg whirled back to her. His face had turned the color of watermelon, and his hands were shaking he was so mad. She stopped laughing.
"Duh-nuhnuhnuhnuh Nuhnuh Manties! Manties!" Cas sang.
"That's Batman, not Spiderman! And they're not panties!"
Ames stomped her foot, which at least caught her friends' attention.
"Stop it you guys. Are we gonna play this stupid game or not?" Not that she wanted to, but it was better than listening to them fight. Again.
"I don't wanna play with you guys anymore." Greg said sullenly.
"Oh, don't be such a baby. I was just funning you, Greg."
Cas slapped him on the shoulder, making him wince.
"You should go first." Greg said as he rubbed the place where she'd hit him. "Ames is right. It was your idea."
"Fine! " Cas rolled her eyes so hard Ames thought they might start spinning in her sockets. But then she swept her hair behind her ears and shooed Ames aside so that she could take her place in front of Greg. Ames shot him a grateful look, but he just frowned at her and stuck up his nose.
This time, when Greg's pants fell, Ames knew well enough not to laugh.
Greg dropped the looped belt over Cas' head. Cas waggled her eyebrows and flashed Ames a wide smile before Greg jerked the belt back until the edges of the plastic dug into Cas's throat; Ames could see her skin poking out around it.
Cas' hands flew to her throat. She scratched at the belt as she flipped from side to side against Greg's body. Greg's forehead was all screwed up from concentrating, and from being mad at Cas. His lips moved silently as he counted down the seconds 'til he was supposed to loosen the belt and let her breathe again. Suddenly, Ames felt like she couldn't breathe either.
Cas kept making little "puh puh puh" noises in her throat that were getting fainter with each breath she couldn't take. Her eyes had gone wide and round as gumballs, and her whole face was twisted up like she was trying to scream. She jabbed her bony elbows at Greg's ribs but even Ames could tell she didn't try hard, or couldn't. After a few seconds her arms sagged at her sides and she started to sway to the left.
"Greg, stop!" Ames said.
"There's still five seconds." Greg said.
"You're hurting her!"
"She's supposed to get all floppy, that's the game."
"No, stop!" Ames ran up to him and pried at his hands.
"Alright, fine!" He loosened his grip, and Cas promptly tipped towards the ground. Ames stuck out her arms to catch her, and with Greg's help laid her flat on a cleaner section of gravel.
"She'll get up in a few seconds." Greg said. But he didn't sound too sure, and neither was Ames.
Ames stuck her ear to Cas's chest like she'd seen the fireman do at their school last month when he came to give a demonstration on fire safety. She could hear the faint thump of Cas's heart, but her chest wasn't moving.
A sick feeling bubbled up deep-down in Ames' belly. When she looked up at Greg again, his face had gone nearly as pale as Cas'.
"She's just being stupid. Come on Cas, get up." He poked at her arm; Cas didn't move.
"I'm gonna get help." Ames said, clambering to her feet. Her heart felt like it was gonna jump out of her ribs.
"No, no she's fine-- come on, Cas, this isn't a joke! Get up!"
But Ames was already bolting across the lot with tears welling in her eyes. The last thing she heard before her hoarse screams for help brought half the neighborhood into the street was Greg's voice, small and terrified.
"Cas? Cas?"
It wasn't the epilogue that had screwed her up though-- made her screw up now, when it mattered, when she couldn't afford to go all stiff and terrified at the mere suggestion of pressure on her throat. It was how they'd gotten there.
---
"What's the matter, Ames? Scared?"
"No." Ames replied, sticking out her bottom lip and scowling at Cassie with all the meanness she could muster.
Cassie beamed.
"Good. Then you can go first."
"Nuh-uh, it was your idea!"
"You're just a 'fraidy-cat!"
"I'm not! This game's just stupid!"
"Ames, just go." Greg hissed. He was holding up his pants with one hand; in the other was his belt, with the buckle end wrapped once around his palm.
"But--"
But Cassie was giving her that look Ames' mom said reminded her of a cat with a bird under its paw, and Greg was watching the hole in the fence like a cop-- or worse, Mrs. Maroonie-- was gonna burst through and chase them off any second.
"Fine." She muttered. She straightened her back, jutted out her chin, and marched the four steps to Greg.
Greg's head pigeon-bobbed as he checked the fence one more time. When he turned to Ames, he opened the hand holding his pants and reached for the free end of the belt.
"Ha! You've got panties on!" Cas crowed.
Greg's hand shot down to his pants again, tugging them up.
"They're not panties, they're briefs!" Greg shouted.
"Nuh uh, they're like man-panties. Spider Man panties. Spider Manties!"
"Shut up Cas!"
Ames giggled, and Greg whirled back to her. His face had turned the color of watermelon, and his hands were shaking he was so mad. She stopped laughing.
"Duh-nuhnuhnuhnuh Nuhnuh Manties! Manties!" Cas sang.
"That's Batman, not Spiderman! And they're not panties!"
Ames stomped her foot, which at least caught her friends' attention.
"Stop it you guys. Are we gonna play this stupid game or not?" Not that she wanted to, but it was better than listening to them fight. Again.
"I don't wanna play with you guys anymore." Greg said sullenly.
"Oh, don't be such a baby. I was just funning you, Greg."
Cas slapped him on the shoulder, making him wince.
"You should go first." Greg said as he rubbed the place where she'd hit him. "Ames is right. It was your idea."
"Fine! " Cas rolled her eyes so hard Ames thought they might start spinning in her sockets. But then she swept her hair behind her ears and shooed Ames aside so that she could take her place in front of Greg. Ames shot him a grateful look, but he just frowned at her and stuck up his nose.
This time, when Greg's pants fell, Ames knew well enough not to laugh.
Greg dropped the looped belt over Cas' head. Cas waggled her eyebrows and flashed Ames a wide smile before Greg jerked the belt back until the edges of the plastic dug into Cas's throat; Ames could see her skin poking out around it.
Cas' hands flew to her throat. She scratched at the belt as she flipped from side to side against Greg's body. Greg's forehead was all screwed up from concentrating, and from being mad at Cas. His lips moved silently as he counted down the seconds 'til he was supposed to loosen the belt and let her breathe again. Suddenly, Ames felt like she couldn't breathe either.
Cas kept making little "puh puh puh" noises in her throat that were getting fainter with each breath she couldn't take. Her eyes had gone wide and round as gumballs, and her whole face was twisted up like she was trying to scream. She jabbed her bony elbows at Greg's ribs but even Ames could tell she didn't try hard, or couldn't. After a few seconds her arms sagged at her sides and she started to sway to the left.
"Greg, stop!" Ames said.
"There's still five seconds." Greg said.
"You're hurting her!"
"She's supposed to get all floppy, that's the game."
"No, stop!" Ames ran up to him and pried at his hands.
"Alright, fine!" He loosened his grip, and Cas promptly tipped towards the ground. Ames stuck out her arms to catch her, and with Greg's help laid her flat on a cleaner section of gravel.
"She'll get up in a few seconds." Greg said. But he didn't sound too sure, and neither was Ames.
Ames stuck her ear to Cas's chest like she'd seen the fireman do at their school last month when he came to give a demonstration on fire safety. She could hear the faint thump of Cas's heart, but her chest wasn't moving.
A sick feeling bubbled up deep-down in Ames' belly. When she looked up at Greg again, his face had gone nearly as pale as Cas'.
"She's just being stupid. Come on Cas, get up." He poked at her arm; Cas didn't move.
"I'm gonna get help." Ames said, clambering to her feet. Her heart felt like it was gonna jump out of her ribs.
"No, no she's fine-- come on, Cas, this isn't a joke! Get up!"
But Ames was already bolting across the lot with tears welling in her eyes. The last thing she heard before her hoarse screams for help brought half the neighborhood into the street was Greg's voice, small and terrified.
"Cas? Cas?"
