Family Values

A lazy midwinter afternoon found Ames breaking her steady takeout-and-pizza diet in favor of a simple dinner of bacon and rice, the former of which she was flipping with her spatula while she hummed along to the music pumping through her earbuds. Suddenly, she felt the dull vibration of her phone against her hip. She glanced from the bacon-- done now, and likely to start burning if she left it a few seconds longer-- to her pocket, then with a sigh she raised the pan from the stove while using her other hand to pluck out her earbuds and wriggle her phone free of her pocket.

When she saw the number on the caller ID, her good mood evaporated.

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[Nervously] C'mon, c'mon you stupid thing.